31 May 2006
Keeskennis's (small) brother
Dr. Boshoff "Skukuza" Steenekamp, last in the foto.
He thinks that what you are flying in can be smaller than yourself.
He is actually very intelligent, you would not have guessed.
We share the the same birthdate, barring the year.
I think I will get the mossie catcher I saw on your site, my present ones go bzzzt... bzzzzt all the time.
It should have read.
"Mmmm I think we can remove this unsightly, fleshy, lumpy, fatty, shortsighted, overweight, growth from your horn Mr. R"
No puns intended.
I do hope this is not awating us poor readers.
I tell you:
: Have you ever seen a thin HUMAN drinking a diet/slim/No Calorie anything?
Obvious proof that these things make you FAT.
Join the club.
Beauty and a beast
A Namakwaland scene from SA Tourism
Not a photoshop colouring job from Aria.
Now that is amazing.
Two bulls kissing from here.
30 May 2006
Mothers are big
In a unrelated matter I realised today that people who never eat hot-hot curry might never know that toilet paper has a soft and a hard side.
29 May 2006
This is a violin bridge
This is a violin showing the bridge and the strings.
All this to tell you KeesKennis is tone deaf, and he cannot sing at all.
Not that this stops him at all - ed
He even performs at poetry evenings -ed
Stunned SILENCES everywhere - ed
Disgrace - ed
Nevertheless, KeesKennis's beloved Mother and Father, in family tradition, sent the firstborn boy, like the sisters' preceding him, for music lessons.
I started with Piano and got chucked out.
I ended with Mr. Osche, a violin teacher.
With my Dad in tow we went for another lesson.
Of all the questions Mr. Osche asked me, I got this one right.
Oshce: How do you play G & E together.
KeesKennis: Oh that is easy, you turn the bow upside down and go underneath the strings.
Dad: Thank you Mr. Osche we will not be bothering you anymore.
As we left I heard Mr. Osche let OUT a sigh... (as dramatic as our beloved cat Babaloo, above.)
A gratuitous picture of beloved mother.
When the USA sneezes the rest of the world catches a cold.
I have lived through Bush 41 proclaiming a "kindler, gentler America"
And after that we had the cigar man.
Europe went from a cold to double kneumonia in record time.
We are animals, just like my Keesie
Photo by Vearl .
KeesKennis hear people say "I am not vegetarian, BUT, I do not think wild animals should be bred to be killed"
"We should not show animals killing other animals it sends the wrong signal to the 'children', you know"
No I do not know.
We hide behind a facade of civility.
As humans we kill more animals than animals do.
We are carnivores and we have to eat.
28 May 2006
My poetic side - a short story
Nobody know's about my cares
Nobody, nobody know's about my cares
Nobody, cares about nose
Nobody, nobody cares about my nose
If the English language had any form or consistency, the term, lackadaisical, would have had something to do with the shortage of flowers.
Now, that is Poetry.
Ah what's in a name? Would not a nose by any name smell the sweets?
True poetry is not to be denied.
Thank you Rob and others matters
Does that statement make you think...."humility?..., no I actualy only do deep sea fishing.
I have lived long enough to to tell the difference ......
Thank you for The last one Speaks for linking me under ......
Drunks & Poets
Straight White Guy
I am honoured.
Gut Rumbles is one step higher under
Please email me if you link me.
My understanding of the software that is supposed to tell me such thing's is shorter than my er....er nose.
Photo by Vearl
Thanks so much for all the beach pix. How cool you have beaches with both colors of water. It reminds me of the Laguna de Siete Colores in the Yucatan.
Maybe I'll overcome my inertia while I'm off this week. For some reason I hate working on the template. I always end up screwing something simple up and spending hours trying to figure out where the typo is.
27 May 2006
Growing up cool & the law
OK, so here is KeesKennis just finding his feet.
I left the family protective unit and developed a thick skin.
"Die LangPlaas" translates into "The LongFarm",
This actually means a road in a urban area.
KeesKennis was earning in spending power in Africa today about USD 190 per month and made three decisions:
: I will not starve.
: The Cops will not catch me.
: I will not ask my family for help.
So I regularly went hunting on the LangPlaas.
I bagged many smaller meat-bearing animals.
So one day I bagged a eland as shown above while riding a Matchless 500 Single motorbike at 2:30 in the morning, about twenty yards from the road, standing still in my headlight.
This is an animal that is bigger than a big cow (beef)
The rush to get a SUV and friends to help pick up the animal and conceal the traces of the illegal hunt was epic.
One friend went to buy a sheep from a "friendly" farmer.
Another came with his dad's pickup with a winch.
We skinned and cut up the eland at my place and distributed the meat to any freezer but mine.
We then skinned and cut up the sheep on the same spot and placed the portions in my freezer.
The Cops, having heard the shot, and knowing that I hunted on the Langplaas, came around and after investigating, had a beer with me.
I am truly glad that CSI new York was not around.
Pics from Vearl.
Two GENTLEMEN, Guyk and Ellison, amongst the many gentlemen and ladies in my readership left a comment at Pumkin 1, I thank you.
And also many thanks to Ellison for bending down and scratching me behind the ears by linking me.
Better luck next time.
26 May 2006
Why can't we just have love?
Lions and heyenas compete for the same meat.
Lions kill hyenas when they can and hyenas kill lion cubs where they find them.
South African Afrikaans newspaper, Beeld, held a fotokompetisie, results on the 12th May.
This is one is a entry by Manie van Vuuren.
Go and look.
I appeal to all of you to go and leave a comment and give her some tips.
Oh the JOY to be 25 and starting your life. (Shurrup, your'e pissed - ed)
Go blog your heart out pumpkin, I will always read your blog.
You must leave a comment, as I will.
Love you SO much.
Thanks for the support but... that picture??? That was me pissed and trying to keep the smoke out of my face. Anyhoo, I'm sending loads of love with this comment.
To many wheels
Plane Pr0n by Vearl.
This is a picture of the Blue Angels.
Tweegatjakkals - Two hole jackal - Politics
My dad called them Tweegatjakkals, translating as TwoHoleJackal or TwoAssJackal,, your choice.
After all we have president's for life here in Africa.
KeesKennis: What is the difference between a whore and a politcian?
Answer : Nothing realy, exept when they both live past the f**king and backstabbing, the one is called "your honour" and the other "madam"
Hastert et al is not good news for the USA, whatever party he represents.
Here we have a politician with two heads, one of which he stole.
And he is using it for his own purposes.
Not realy he is,after all only a tweegatjakkals.
The photo from Vearl our retired Marine.
Visit his site, he posts the most beautiful pics.
I will most probably use a lot of his shots in the future.
His pic's is just so much better than mine.
Not because he uses better equipment, I could buy that.
Not because of the eye for compostion, I have it and can practise more.
He has PATIENCE, KeesKennis does not.
A present for mommy
Look what the cat dragged in this morning
Then left it right there and started playing.
The photos are from this man retired from the USMC nogal.
His photo's is incredible.
was working on during his time in the USAF.
Photo from here, check out the whole site
First found at Ellison.
24 May 2006
I need help
KeesKennis was very lucky with his choice of Mother and Father.
They were considered worse than commies, but they taught us english.
What is bothering me is this.
When English was being derived from Latin and Gaelic and others, everyting had to get a name.
So these two objects below had to be given expresive names.
How come the latter walked away with the name MORNING GLORY?
Inquiring minds want to know.
But sometimes I also wonder where the names of various flora and fauna come from. Can't be that plants are always named from their looks--I can just imagine what a banana would be called or maybe even a cucumber.
Lotto in the jungle
I see that Kim is in need of winning a lottery. Well at least if he does he will not spend it on something evil like guns, would he?
"Now all I have to do is buy that winning lottery ticket."
I finaly figured out how to make a link to a specific post in another blog.
Computer wise I am now as old my brother's grandson.
I still have to ask him to set the recording on the VCR though.
And when I first got the phone, I had to have one show me how to retrieve my pictures, lower the volume.....oh and then there was the time I managed to LOCK myself out of the phone.
Your tax dollars at work - USA USA USA USA
This truck carying USAID supplies overturned on our contract.
Old eyes and shitty shot be damned, I think it says, refined vegetable oil.
22 May 2006
I you have any sensibility at all don't click on that link.
He says: EFF
Hard and fast all the time.
You know the Brits and their derivatives, say Eff when they mean Hey...
"...jesus, a guy can't slip into a 2 day Absinthe related coma these days without endless speculation regarding his whereabouts. More tomorrow.
May 12th 4.34pm
"Twenty! How are ya? Haven't seen you in ages!"
"Ahhh Jaysus, howya Pete. Fancy a quick pint?"
"Go on then. Just the one though, I have to be back home this evening for a party the missus is throwing."
May 13th 10.21am
Catblogging the King
Ever since Kees was a small Keesie like the one clinging to its Mama's back above, I have had good ears.
Listening about campfires, I heard stories that were not meant for my delicate little mind.
We are blogging about the King of the Cats and his influence on the mind of primitive man.
Extreme provincialism was the order of the day.
So whenever I mention "Bolander" insert the name of someone from a (Province)(State)(Country)(Region) who's inhabitants show bad markmanship, poor hunting skills, or good wine above beer or hard tack/loves beer over good wine or hard tack, have more money than you, have bad taste/good taste - insert something like "Virginian" or "Frenchie" for instance.
So the story goes...
These two Bolanders with their 'airs' and 'sophistication' booked a hunting holiday.
It is day two and they have shot nothing for the pot.
To get someting to eat... they bought some canned meatballs at a local shop.
They are sitting around a campfire drinking and boasting.
They have just showered under a small waterfall and are dressed in the latest sports gear. Loose pants, T-shirts (with appropriate designer logo's) and calf high "hunting" boots, in vogue with fashionably loose laces, the boots funneling about their lower legs. (Huh - the resident mosquitos are having a feast!)
Their rifles are leaning against a nearby chair.
Tom the one Bolander, was sitting on his haunches next to the fire holding a longhandled frying pan in one hand and heating the meatballs over the fire.
Bolander Jan: Hey Tom, what would you do if Big Male Lion
walked right up to you now while you are heating the food?
Bolander Tom: I would look him straight in the eye - I am very strong that way you know - get up, take my gun and shoot him between the eyes! Pour us another, won't you.
Drinks are served.
The hunting trip is going well.
At that moment a big, dirty, ugly...
... lion then parts the grass and says: HUAEWHGrrrr are you!
Ashenfaced, Tom now retreats backwards on his haunches.
In his panic by the fourth step backwards, he starts tipping the boiling meatballs into his boot.
FOK! says he, I never knew shit could be this HOT!
Photo's by Ron Eggert
21 May 2006
I'm the Captain
This is about as much as we normally see of hippos.
That rings a bell.
I grew up as a much loved and protected kid.
At about 15 years of age the parental reins were loosened, or I rebelled.
Anyway I made friends with a "wilder" bunch of boys (some of them had actually had sex).
Divorce? I knew of nobody who had divorced.
These new found friends had a couple of mothers and fathers each.
I loved my new freedom and the friendship thrived.
We are still talking hippos, just hang in...
Experience of alcohol? A few tipples and maybe an uncle or two who'd had a few too many on occasion.
Here I was expected to serve and drink along with everybody else!
So Piet, my friend and I, and his dad and his uncle - on a 'dad's weekend' away -landed up at the Hartbeespoort Dam at a cheap caravan park next to the Neft Nature Reserve.
Piet's dad and his uncle were both Captains in the SA Prison Service.
These two 'grownups'(about 250 lbs and 6 ft tall apiece, clad in the briefest of speedos) settle into two comfy beach chairs with their rods and tackle in the blazing African sun. Under the umbrella they place a gas fridge groaning with coca cola and a crate of brandy.
They toss the closest kid the car keys and a couple of bucks and grunt "park the caravan and level it and then find some pussy. Don't knock anybody up or I'll skin you alive, now fokof"
On their normal weekends they don't use the caravan at all but stay in their chairs drinking and fishing for 2 days and 2 nights. This was also the first time ever that I had bunked school (Friday and Monday).
Late on the night of day two we come 'home' after spending most of the money that we lifted from dad's wallet (uncle was still sitting on his, stingy bastard).
Both dad and uncle were now sitting heavily having consumed 2 bottles of brandy each, in about 9 hours. They were seeing Pink Elephants by now.
They acknowledged our presence with a few grunts and fokof's. And we retire to the caravan, about 50 yards from the water.
At 3 O' clock the next morning we are awakened by an awful commotion. We rush out and see these super athletes stumbling towards the caravan because a Hippo was stomping out their fire.
500 lbs of Captain with four flailing arms and legs unite at the caravan door of two and a half feet wide. Ouch!
We stay well clear.
The Hippo also stomps on one chair and returns to the water satisfied.
PIECED TOGETHER LATER...
Neft Nature Reserve has a few hippos and a fence that runs far into the dam.
The dam's level was low.
One hippo swam around the fence and saw the fire.
Both our Captains apparently saw the creature as it emerged slowly from the water, but refused to acknowledge it to his partner in crime - as this would indicate, "I am drunk", which is a mortal sin - until said Hippo as is his wont, started to stamp out the fire.
Pink Elephants indeed (yah, about as pink as their sunburned skin).
Ouch and Indeed is trademarked by Glen and I use it with his permission.
South African Rednecks is trademarked by myself but I acknowledge this post in their forming.
"rods and tackle" is words I learnt from this man, I never equated angling with fish.
20 May 2006
Blogging is dangerous - My first threatening letter.
The 18 page scrawled rambling is fuuuull of threats.
"the words, stupid, prehistoric, dumb an even worse "tasty" is all to common in your post.
THE ONLY WAY TO DESCRIBE US IS TOUGH.
So all your worldly wisdom will not help you.
You are no better than the small rocks you call pebbles.
Check out this painting by a world famous artist."
I must say that small rock bit got to me.(he actually started hitting the moniter-ed)
All we can say is thanks to this Lollie-Pop and Weightlessness
IIIII'm nnnot scared, lllet them try something here.
From the gate: Sorry Sir do I let the TTO reps in. (Tanzania Tarentaal Orginisation- ed)
ed-ed will post this as KK has other important matters to attend to.
We have not even found a place to hang it yet.
Here she/he/it is perched on a chair.
By Munna Atta.
Awe, Inspiration, Testorone and Wonder.
Basically I let the photo below speak for me while commenting there.
NASA will forgive me I am sure.
For the love of ??? I do not find a way to link to this photo on their site.
I any case this man linked it all.
Imagine having that photo on your wall and telling your grandchild, that's me.
The cost of "taming the hinterland" on three continents was far greater.
The cost of the other continents are, and will be, for a while, still be adding up.
We don't know it all, let's not stop the people who want to find more.
Why hold back the bright keesies because the beetpicker keesies cant compete?.
A river run's through it.
A small river runs next to my house, 15 meters away and 20 meters deep
I leaves a pleasent sound to the ears.
Most probably the reason that I have not felt the need to kill anybody these past 30 months.
Thank You River Gods.
From the other side of the river you can just see Wally House.
Sorry Guyk, I have not even tried the many pools on this river, you might be sleeping next to the river.
Fish is so plentifull here we tend to take it for granted.
I do my best to spruce up my yard and pretend that I can't see right in to my neighbor's place.