08 June 2010


What have I wrought?

I always knew I had the body to inspire poetry

Back left to right: Keesie, Keesie, Keesie, Keesie, Keesie, Keesie
Front Left to Right and Right to Left: Rat Bastard Commies

About which Keesie is the poems below?

FROM: cont 2
Nobody said it was easy,
writing a poem for Keesie.
My brain's just not wired
My mind's kind of tired,
And I don't want to post something sleezy.


FROM: cont
There once was a knowledge baboon
Whose poetry rhymed none to soon,
And he wrote Vogon lines
Which deserved hefty fines
& a boot round the back o'the moon!

Ole Phat Stu

Down in darkest Africa,
South of the Zambezi,
There lives a hardy Boer man
The folks all call "Oom Keesie."

Now, Keesie is a soldier-man
Who fought the godless Commies
And speaks een kleintje Nederlands,
Unlike those awful Pommies.

He lives amidst the jungle dark,
Where snakes and tigers menace,
But not a single one of them's
A match for old KeesKennis.

If Jim should see a crocodile,
No need to start in screaming:
When Keesie gets his hands on it,
Its blood will soon be streaming.

But he's a friendly kind of bloke,
The kind I'd want to drink with.
Knows how to tell a filthy joke
About the holes we stink with.

Let's make a toast. I'll raise my glass
And drink to our KeesKennis -
Who kicks the mighty lion's ass
(Too bad he sucks at tennis.)


FROM A poetry contest

Kennis the Menace
did let out a fart,
a stinker of poesy
he called pure art.

To his nose a blossom
it seemed soft and fair,
Considered it awesome,
his crop-dusted air.

As a beauty beheld
is a beauty apprised,
that we think it noxious
should be no surprise.

Compared to fair prof'rings
of things bright and true
Keesie's foul offering
has us turning blue.

Johanna van Arkel

And at SWG in the comments

There was a young man they called Blade
Who liked to sip gin in the shade
When he took out his shovel
His guests all feared trouble
And shot rockets off into the glade


Thank you all, it was fun

Kees, at his leishz
In the breeze
Farts sparkling wheeze

And the big cats cower
And the reptiles sneeze

When Kees, at his leishz
Farts sparkling wheeze.
I know of man they call Kees
Roams the jungle whenever he please
There is nothing he fears
and I'm told that he leers
at the wimmen who hide in his trees
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