30 April 2007
Bad advice
HE says "Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants and handed them to your mother, and said,here - try these on."
So she did and said, "these are too big, I can't wear them".
So I replied,"...exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will. Ever since that night we have never had any problems."
"Hmmm," says Jack. He thinks that might be a good thing to try.
So on his honeymoon Jack takes offhis pants and says to Jill, "Here, try these on."
So she does and says, "These are too large, they don't fit me."
So Jack says, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don't want you to ever forget that."
Then Jill takes off her pants and hands them to Jack and says, "Here, you try on mine."
So he does and says, "I can't get into your pants."
So Jill says, "Exactly. And if you don't change your ridiculous attitude, you never will."
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Comments:
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LOL! Aint it the truth!
hammer Homepage 04.30.07 - 9:01 pm #
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You've got that right! LOL
LeeAnn 04.30.07 - 5:54 pm #
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LoL...cute Kees!
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.30.07 - 5:17 pm #
28 April 2007
Beware
26 April 2007
Get your doggy a bone
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Something smells a bit "fishy" 'round here... HEre boy! Go fetch your toy!
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Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "Giving the dog a bone".
One square - Is it possible
Carefully fold it in quarters.
Then on the inside corner (not edges, please), tear out a little finger nail sized piece of the square and carefully save it.
Open the square, and insert your middle finger in the hole, which is now in the center of the toilet paper square.
Proceed to wipe yourself, using your middle finger.
Then, folding the sheet of toilet paper about your middle finger, cleanse your middle finger and throw away the used sheet.
Now, take the thumb-nail sized piece of paper torn out and saved. Use the intact corner to cleanse under your middle finger nail.
So I suppose a crime like making a TP fountain is a capital offence nowadays.
25 April 2007
Ooopsie
Maybe this guy should have gone to Stu for lessons.
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Comments:
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OK man, that deserves an extra flying lesson Which I'll blog on friday, OK?
Stu Savory Homepage 05.02.07 - 9:59 pm #
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Da plane, Da plane!
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.25.07 - 9:50 pm #
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Great photo....made me laugh.
LeeAnn 04.25.07 - 9:28 pm #
Fire the cox
Playing somewhere near you soon.
Comments:
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These are our 'non-documented' workers at their best! No wonder so many want them here. Awesome!
JR Homepage 04.25.07 - 1:38 pm #
24 April 2007
Who thinks up stuff like this? - Wednesdays
Vacancy - Crocodile feeder
23 April 2007
Photoshop for Blob
The sharpshooting Cowboy gave us this.
I thought that the picture was not militaristic enough so I added some big ass weapons.
BTW can somebody identify the tank for me please.
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Comments:
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Awesome! Where do I sign up?
Light Tank M3A3 (Stuart V) 1941
hammer Homepage 04.23.07 - 11:26 am #
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what tank?
GUYK Homepage 04.23.07 - 4:28 pm #
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Well, that's the first decent excuse for a pink gun I've ever seen.
BobG Homepage 04.23.07 - 6:26 pm #
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Ahhh! women love a man in Camo!
Rex Homepage 04.24.07 - 2:33 am #
21 April 2007
The Octopus
And if you can show me a living person that has ignored a instruction from her, I'll look like a baboon.
As I am a land based animal I had to swot up some facts about octopi.
They don't fly very well.
They have 8 legs. But I have never seen one climb a tree as good as me.
The rumour that rumoured that a date with Kees is like a petting session with a octopus, was started by jealous male rivals and is entirely wrong.
Stupid assholes did not know the word, octopi.
They come in all sizes from 6 inches to plenty feet.
They mostly start off as bite size snacks.
The also make money by posing for statues that are then made into yewelry.
I aquired a pair, but I dont think they suit me.
I don't think they have enough brains to tame as household pets.
You should try this, it makes you brave. (see French - Ed)
Now download this and colour it in (do not cross the lines) and send it to Goldbloom.
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Comments:
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LOL Kees. Well there you have it, all the things one could possibly want to know about octopi. Once again Kees you have succeeded in educating us who are naive to the ways of the animal kingdom. By the way I thought the earrings looked quite lovely on you. [hehehe] I think I'll skip the tasty morsel though, for some reason my stomach is all queasy...now if you'll excuse me I think I have to hurl.
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.21.07 - 7:32 pm #
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I use octopus in sea food gumbos..not bad eating
GUYK Homepage 04.22.07 - 3:14 am #
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oh, I forgot to add..best cut them up before you pitch them in the gumbo pot..they will crawl out otherwise..
GUYK Homepage 04.22.07 - 3:14 am #
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They'll Crawl out??? EWWWWWW! Okay now I'm definitely going to hurl.
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.22.07 - 5:33 pm #
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I like octopus in gumbo also.
BobG Homepage 04.22.07 - 8:01 pm #
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The earrings...only you, Kees could carry them off with such... panache.by the way... the one with the balloons? that's what it looks like when they lay eggs. 'course, they then hide themselves in caves and die..but one can't have everything.
Nancy Homepage 04.23.07 - 3:02 am #
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On my honeymoon in Mexico my wife ate an octopus pot pie with tentacles hanging out of the crust. I almost puked.I wouldn't kiss her till she brushed the suckers out of her teeth
hammer Homepage 04.22.07 - 11:40 pm #
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It is the season for the race to aquire Lord Stanley's Cup in the hockey world. Rabid Detroit fans smuggle in dead octopi to throw on the ice to show their support.
Maeve Homepage 04.24.07 - 2:59 am #
The Friday Ark
Friday Ark is a free service where you can pimp your blog.
Fact:
The Modulator is not a robot and he spends time breathing in between Fridays.
So all you animal lovers, go over there and pay your dues.
One question remains:
Why did Noah not drown the flies in his coffee?
20 April 2007
Miss Sassie Poodle is upset
Kees handling stress.
Yellow, yellow everywhere.
And with the promise of a tree orchid fest on it's way, I come down to room temperature again.
Got spare time?
Have you ever felt .....
19 April 2007
Faces from elsewhere
Maybe not as nice as this youngster, but still nice.
The top photos are of a baby ray and I got the piccies from here and here.
The "eyes" are his nostrils or something, the real eyes are on the other side.
Comments:
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Them baby rays are bait stealers and can't hurt you with that stinger
GUYK Homepage 04.20.07 - 3:23 pm #
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Awwww...Lil Ray Ray is adorable!
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.19.07 - 3:52 pm #
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Reminds me of a girl I knew in high school.
BobG Homepage 04.20.07 - 1:20 am #
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Those are neat pictures; I've never seen a "baby ray".
Must get fit - 2
Here Silha caught a Great cormorant during his/her morning routine.
Swan Lake by Shacky shows you the elegant way to do neck stretches.
I and the bird is up and running at Bell Tower Birding.
He alleges that my picture on this post was rejected by CuteOverload, Bhaw ha haaa.
Go and read the whole post and look at all the entries. It is really worth your time.
18 April 2007
Some bloggers are planning ....
This picture was taken at the last one.
What can I say?
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Comments:
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I thought it looked like Cat, too.
Chickie Homepage 04.19.07 - 11:36 pm #
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Maeve Homepage 04.19.07 - 2:41 am #
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great, a picture of my family reunion.
Rex Homepage 04.18.07 - 7:25 pm #
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Who's in the bush?
LeeAnn 04.18.07 - 7:05 pm #
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The only thing scarier than a crazy-looking guy with his finger on the trigger of a rifle is a naked crazy-looking guy with his finger on the trigger of a rifle. It makes me worry what he's going to do to you after he shoots you...This one needs a caption contest, badly.
BobG Homepage 04.18.07 - 6:57 pm #.
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That is the strangest lawn gnome I have ever seen.
hammer Homepage 04.18.07 - 4:58 pm #
I wish .....
17 April 2007
One lap around the sun 17 April 06 to 17 April 07
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Glad to see you made a year. I'm looking forward to another year of not knowing what to expect when I come by for a visit. MC
Happy Blogiversary Keesie baby. Hugs & kisses from Canada!
Just Damn! A whole year! Hardly seems like it's been that long...I've gotta hand it to you, Keesie - you have a unique site with a unique point of view to go along with it. And you take such pleasure interacting with us, your demented commenters and readers. I owe V-Man a thank-you for bringing this strange, strange place to my attention. May you enjoy the next year of squeezing out those Word-'n'-Piccie Squizzots as much as the first one.
Congrats on the year! I love the pics and stories Kees - keep it goin'!!!
Happy Blogday! And keep them pictures a'comin'! Most importantly, have fun.
I look forward to many more postings. Happy anniversary.
16 April 2007
Best friends
Two 90-year-old men, Moe and Joe, have been friends all of their lives. When it's clear that Joe is dying, Moe visits him everyday.
One day, Moe says, "Joe, we both loved baseball all our lives and we played minor league ball together for so many years. Please do me one favor. When you get to Heaven, somehow, you must let me know if there's baseball there."
Joe looks up at Moe from his death bed," Moe, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favor for you."
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.At midnight, a couple of nights later, Moe is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him," Moe. Moe.""
Who is it"? asks Moe, sitting up suddenly. "Who is it"?"
Moe, it's me, Joe."
"You're not Joe. Joe just died."
"I'm telling you, it's me, Joe," insists the voice."
"Joe! Where are you"?
"In Heaven," replies Joe. "I have some really good news and a little bad news."
"Tell me the good news first," says Moe.
"The good news," Joe says "is that there's baseball in Heaven. Better yet, all of our old buddies who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always Spring time and it never rains or snows.
And best of all, we can play baseball all we want and we never get tired."
"That's fantastic," says Moe. "It's beyond my wildest dreams! So, what's the bad news"?
"You're pitching Tuesday."
14 April 2007
The letter C
Brits, what is left?
With my close links to animals I produced this.
Politics does not play a role.
Real cat's
Must get fit
13 April 2007
Gorilla numbers dwindling
12 April 2007
See the compassion
11 April 2007
"Indian Heads" and other humanoid rocks
... that last picture is beautiful on so very many levels.....
Romance
Looks like a party
10 April 2007
Group Photo
Comments:
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Christmas Cards! BRILLIANT!!! Gotta run, gotta get in touch with hallmark and get them to put words to it. Or, email them to me, I'll post it with the best!! lol, Hope you don't mind me horning in Kees?
DaD Homepage 04.14.07 - 9:52 pm #
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Now let me see,,, whaere are the beach balls?
DaD Homepage 04.13.07 - 6:03 am #
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Omg...that is hilarious!
Cindi Homepage 04.11.07 - 11:14 am #
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Where are my golf cleats
hammer Homepage 04.11.07 - 8:35 am #
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Keesie, are you sun bathing nekkid again? The Cat's mother is not going to be happy with you!
Maeve Homepage 04.11.07 - 6:51 am #
He's a happy little fellow isn't he?
holder Homepage 04.11.07 - 3:01 am #
Oh my goodness...if I were equipped, thusly, as that man hanging out in the background, I'd apply some sun-block to that/those thing[s].
Erica Homepage 04.11.07 - 1:26 am #
PS a thong? Heck, I am trying to figure out what strength SPF I would need to keep my whiteys from broiling! Never could understand the concept.
ralphd00d Homepage 04.11.07 - 12:35 am #
Too funny!
LeeAnn 04.10.07 - 6:50 pm #
MY GOD WHERE IS THAT BEACH LOCATED??? j/k LOL
MrsJoseGoldbloom Homepage 04.10.07 - 6:41 pm #
LOL!You'd think somebody would have bothered to PS a thong on him or something before posting it on the Web. Not exactly the sort of thing you use for making your Christmas cards.
BobG Homepage 04.10.07 - 6:27 pm #